Men and Depression

 Men and women suffer depression almost equally.  Men, however, are frequently taught that any need for help shows weakness.  Therefore, they are naturally at greater risk for depression-related illnesses and suicide because they hide what is going on from everyone, often even denying it to themselves.

Most men attempt to hide their depression by trying to cover their feelings. They may do this with drugs, alcohol, sex, or work. Depression often shows up  in men not as seeming helpless or hopeless, but as angry, frustrated, and/or other aggressive feelings. Men are generally less likely to seek treatment than women and they are less likely to admit that they have a problem. 

Depression in men is a silent battle that barely makes a rumble until the battle is over. The drugs and the smiles and the carrying on and acting hide many of the typical signs of depression from others. It's hard to pick up on the signs of depression if you are close to the person, and it's even harder if they are trying to cover the feelings up. 

If you notice that a loved one is showing any of the typical depression signs like oversleeping or not sleeping, tension, or uncontrollable anger (in the case of men) you should address the issues. Let the person know you care about them and that you are ready to listen when they are ready to talk. It's important not to push the issue or expect a solution. Sometimes,  the best thing to do is offer support, then   just let things run their course with men. 

If you are a man who is depressed, there are a few things you can do to help yourself:

• Talk about how you feel- 
• Stay active -  (Find an activity that you enjoy)
• Exercise, , Keep moving
• Give yourself a break, Allow yourself to be human 
• Find a way to relax at the end of a busy day,
• Try to eat properly
• Seek professional help when needed
• 
  

Anger Management- Sit Down and Think

Both my sister and my daughter shared this on Facebook.  I couldn't help but chuckle, and I hope you do too.  I know, beside the cute puppies, what I liked about this is that I could relate.  Admit it,  you have probably wished more than once that you could get away doing just this very thing to a someone you are angry with.  I know I have, more than once.  (More times than I would like to admit.)  


The message though is so true.  It does help to sit down and think about the problem.  What is it you are angry about?  Experience has shown me that it is rarely what I initially tell myself I am angry about.  When I take the time to sit and think about the situation it is a feeling that was triggered, a memory that surfaced, the way I perceived the situation or a belief which was challenged.   I learned many years ago, that if I say I am angry at someone or with someone, it is never about them.  It is always about me.  Taking the time to sit and think allows the initial feeling of anger to dissipate so I can recognize the true feeling of disappointment, frustration, annoyance or hurt that is beneath the surface.  Taking the time to sit and think allows you the chance to look at the situation or other person with a clearer view.  Are you angry with other person because of something you believe they did or said, or are you angry with yourself for allowing the other person to do or say something or act in a way that triggered something within you don't like. 
Once you have identified the deeper feeling, you can move forward in dealing with the anger.  Take a few moments longer to sit and think about the problem.  What can you do about the situation? Can you make it better ?  Can you make a change so the situation or person is more tolerable?  Or is this one of those times when there is nothing you can do but accept what is until a change occurs? 

If you have found your answer you can get up and move.  Release the feelings and let them go.   Release the feelings about the other person and let them move on either with you or away from you.  Get up and get away from the problem .  Find or seek out what gives you peace, joy and happiness.


I hope the next time you are angry, you can remember this picture.  Maybe it will give a moment to feel laughter instead of anger.  Maybe it will be a reminder to tackle the problem in a different way.  Maybe it will remind you to stop, take a breath and think before reacting.  What ever it does for you is perfect.    Have fun and stay happy.